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Heck, you're lucky to talk to your mom or dad once a month, tops, and when you do, the conversations are more of the “strictly business” type, with few details. D., assistant professor of human development and family studies at Iowa State University, assures that being estranged from your parents is more common than you may think.

Maybe you're the complete oppose: You come from a distant family and can’t relate to the closeness you see or hear about between some parents and their adult kids.Tension between parents and adult children are pretty standard—especially when the adult child depends on the parent a great deal for support, when a parent overdoes the unsolicited advice, and when either the parent or child feels ambivalent about being a significant part of the other’s life href=" Tensions in the parent and adult child relationship: Links to solidarity and ambivalence.</a> Birditt KS, Miller LM, Fingerman KL.Psychology and aging, 2009, Jul.;24(2):0882-7974.'.  The good news is this tension decreases with age, as we learn to pick our own battles and accept our parents for who they are.(As Luskin says, “To be human is to be in some way messed up by your parents.” Remember to thank them for that next Mother's or Father's Day.)But harboring resentment toward those who raised us only hurts ourselves most in the long run. No matter how bad your situation was growing up, Luskin believes that in order to lead a happy, healthy life, you need to expend less energy pointing the finger and more energy mastering coping skills for dealing with emotional triggers and relationship issues.“Part of growing up is dealing with whatever damage you got from your childhood and working through it,” Luskin says. Therapy is always a great option, but so too are strategies like yoga, meditation, and martial arts—anything that quiets and calms the mind and body, he says.

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